Raising a child is a difficult task. Trying to understand yourself is hard enough but having a child who is dependent on you requires you to understand him also. Our parents play a great role in our lives. They possess the responsibility and joy no other person can possibly understand unless they also are a parent. They have the responsibility of providing and caring for another human being and of being that child’s sole provider. The joy of having a child is even harder to comprehend: the joy of being the first one he ever loved, missed and bonded with. When describing such a gift wrapped in such a beautiful package the word responsibility doesn’t do it justice. However, the word honor does.
A child is a symbol of the treasure of innocence, the joy of love, and the celebration of life. To see the world through a child’s eyes is like seeing it for the first time. How lucky a person is to be a parent. To be able to experience joy and pain and get out of it continuous love.
How parents accept their child is up to them. The child’s decision, however, has already been made. He will love them the only way he knows how: unconditionally. To love someone unconditionally is difficult. Still, it is something we all once did master and somehow managed to forget in our growing years.
Unconditional love is the gift that is given without expecting a thank you card. It is accepting yourself, your child, your family and all others for their good point and bad, talents and handicaps. It comes with no strings attached, no written rules, and no judgement on the other. It is a love that cannot be bargained for, cannot be hidden, and does not have a price. Unconditional love is given freely. When a parent gives such a gift to a child they give them the freedom that allows them to be the individual that God created them to be in the time He intended.
To love unconditionally is not a feeling but a decision. Roots are grown, sacrifices are made, and a foundation was laid. The roots bond us together. They are a common thread that link our hearts and beckon us to love. The flame may dwindle but the foundation that was already laid at birth, which pushed aside love of convenience and embraced love of Christ, is still present. It calls us to fight for that love. Parents get the first glimpse of this love when they fall in love with each other. The second one come with the arrival of each child. The love is pure and unconditional but once it is learned that something can be gained with it, it is used instead of given. Each day the decision must be made to give rather than use. Through the giving, we will come a touch closer to the love God shares with us.
It important to remember that our parents didn’t have all the answers. If we weren’t given unconditional love it is because they didn’t have it to give. Their childhood had hidden rooms of pain that limited their ability to be healthy parents. Maybe all our expectations were not met but I’m sure if we looked closer we would find many that were. My parents are human as I am sure yours are. The hands that once shook a finger at me also cradled me. The mouth that once screamed, also assured. They strived to give more than their parents gave them but lacked the means to work with. Although the outcome was not always good, the intentions were. Our parents paved the dirt road that their parents walked, in hope it would lead to a better life for their children. We, however, will seek new roads because we have been given new directions.
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