Psalm 139: 1-4
You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. 4 Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely.
Are you having a Grey’s Anatomy moment? The one where you say, “So pick me! Love me! Choose Me! Are you looking outside yourself for love and approval? Are you trying to make sense of who you are by listening to what others say to you or say about you? Maybe you are having a Sally Fields acceptance speech moment, “I can’t deny the fact that you like me, right now, you really like me!” It is great to feel that approval, but you can’t build the foundation of who you are on that. You can’t live for the moments others give you approval that confirms you are likeable. Those moments are not guaranteed. People will fail to come through for you.
Seeking approval of others causes you to doubt yourself and God. The enemy wants you to look to everything and anything for approval. He wants you to believe you can control how others feel about you, by what you do and say. When it doesn’t work you get disappointed. The enemy wants you to take responsibility for other people’s feelings and choices. It is unsettling to your soul to try to juggle the emotions of others. That is exactly where the enemy wants you, unsettled. He wants you doubting yourself and doubting God.
Doubt your doubt. When doubt overwhelms you, take a moment to doubt it before you believe it and spiral into assumptions. When you doubt ask yourself where your mind is? Is it focused on God or has it wandered off and is stuck on a distraction. Seek God in these moments and ask Him to help you see the truth.
Instead of looking for approval outside of yourself, from people that may not be in the positions to give it to you, turn inward and feel God’s love and approval. Turn to Him who knows you. He knows your thoughts, fears, passions, and intentions. He sees the masks you put on. He sees what you are hiding. You never have to assume how God feels about you. In all the beauty and mess, He loves and approves.
God calls you to pick you, love you and choose you every day. But when you can’t pick you, God does. When you can’t love you, God does. When you can’t choose you, God does. He always will. God wants you to feel like Sally Field did in her speech, about Him, all the time. He wants you to not be able to deny the fact that He likes you. He really likes you, in every moment, right now, and always.
You are a warrior armed with God’s unfailing love. Stand strong on the foundation He has built. Dig deep. Know yourself! Love yourself! In those moments of self-love and acceptance God works through you. Grow those moments. When you think you are stuck and can’t move forward move where you are at. Pray, go to church, be kind to yourself, praise God and get outside of yourself! You have the power to choose. Choose you! Choose God!
Prayer
Father God,
Thank you for choosing me, picking me, and loving me! Thank you for your unfailing love. You see me and accept me. You give your love unconditionally. You search me. You know me. You make time for me. Thank your for really like me. Thank you for being my rock! Forgive me for doubting you. Forgive me for placing so much energy in seeking approval of others. Yours is the only approval I need. Help me to see you in every situation and know what to do. Help me to continually fall in love with myself. When doubts rush in may I doubt my doubt. May I take a second look at my doubtful thoughts and not spiral into thoughts that aren’t true, but instead choose you. You are my strength. You are enough! I am enough!
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